A Mommy Day

Today I was at home with a sick little girl.

Sydney has impetigo, a bacterial infection that causes canker sores in the throat and inside the mouth and cold sores on the lips. The poor kid had a fever for three days. That finally broke but she has no appetite and is having a hard time even eating bread. Chocolate milk and ice cream are about the only things that she can really enjoy at this point.

She started on antibiotics today and will be on them for 10 days. I am hoping that the drugs kick in soon and she is on the mend.

The only good thing about Sydney not feeling well is all of the cuddles that I get!

It is nice to have her home with me. It gives me something else to do besides think about myself. I have to admit though, that I am exhausted and will sleep well tonight. I am definitely not ready to do this full time!

Nighty night.

Love CJ

Not much new

I haven't been writing much in my blog lately, because not much new is happening.

I have had 13 of 30 power sunbathing treatments as of today and each day is pretty much a repeat of the next. Wake up, help Sean get himself and Sydney out the door, take Sydney to daycare, go to my power sunbathing appointment, perhaps have lunch with a friend or Mom, have a nap in the afternoon, pick up Sydney......well you get the picture. Really not worth repeating THAT everyday.

My skin is getting more tanned by the minute and is getting a little more tender, but so far not too bad. I am finding that I am tiring quite easily. I'm not sure if that's because I have been having a harder time sleeping or it's because the power sunbathing is starting to catch up to me. However, power sunbathing can cause insomnia and/or fatigue, so perhaps it's both!

Tomorrow will be slightly more exciting because in addition to my power sunbathing appointment, I have to meet with two of my doctors for follow-up, have blood tests and have another Herceptin infusion (#6 of 18).

Nothing much else to say except that I'm just trucking through all of the appointments and treatments, counting down each one of them.

I'm glad I'm good at math!

Love CJ

21 Natural Highs

Some Friday thoughts.....

Think about them one at a time BEFORE you move onto the next one...

1. Laughing so hard that your face hurts.
2. No lines at the supermarket, bank or post office.
3. Taking a drive on a pretty road.
4. Hearing your favourite song on the radio.
5. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
6. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
7. A good conversation.
8. Lying on a warm, sunny beach.
9. Finding a 20 bill in your coat from last winter.
10. Sharing a sunset with someone special.
11. Running through sprinklers.
12. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
13. Friends.
14. Accidentally hearing someone say something nice about you.
15. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
16. Playing with a new puppy.
17. Having someone play with your hair.
18. Swinging on swings.
19. Making chocolate chip cookies.
20. Holding hands with someone you care about.
21. Knowing you've done the right thing, no matter what other people think.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Love CJ

A Good Week

It just dawned on me this morning that I haven't written on my blog for a week. Sorry about that.

Last weekend, Sean and I went to Toronto for a well deserved little break. Sydney had fun at Grandma's house......not sure if she even missed us as she didn't want to leave when we got home!

We stayed at the Intercontinental Hotel in downtown Toronto and went with no plans. We dropped into IKEA on the way for a little bit o' shopping. Hung out at the Eaton Centre and went for a nice dinner. The next day we headed out to the Art Gallery of Ontario to see the Ansel Adams exhibition. It was a tiring but fun weekend. Just the break we both needed.

Dawn came to visit me for the day yesterday. I haven't seen her for awhile and it was nice just to hang out and do some catching up.

I have had 6 of 30 power sunbathing treatments to date and things are going well. I have a bit of tenderness on the skin but nothing else as of yet.

Love CJ

Easy Bake Oven

The machine didn't breakdown today, so I got a better idea of how long each treatment will take. Basically from the time I check in until the time I am ready to leave it takes about 30 minutes. This I can handle.

Although power sunbathing is technically a no brainer compared to chemo, for some reason I seem to be more disturbed by it. As I was lying in the machine today, the thought crossed my mind - "this is what it must feel like to be in an easy bake oven."

Perhaps it is more disturbing because I am at the hospital on a daily basis, which is a constant reminder that I am recovering from breast cancer. I've long gotten over the hair reminder. I am so used to it now.

I find I'm thinking more about having cancer while they are setting me up in the machine.

Maybe my brain is finally starting to process the fact that I had breast cancer and this is something that I will have to fight (to some degree) and think about for the rest of my life. I've just been powering through the chemo and now my brain is becoming a bit clearer.

Maybe hearing about Nancy at Wellspring yesterday gave me a little dose of reality too.

I am lucky to be alive.

Love CJ

Power Sunbathing

My first radiation treatment was on the menu for today.

The radiology technicians seem to be a fun bunch. Today I met Claire and Eva, who walked me through the daily procedure.

Basically I check in every day at the desk and they let the technicians know that I have arrived. They will also confirm that my appointment for the next day is still as scheduled. Every Tuesday I receive my schedule of appointments for the next five days as each day is different. Then I get to change into my lovely hospital gown and head into the treatment room.

I then lay on a thin table and put my right arm over my head so they can access my right side. They use the tattoos to set up the radiation machine to ensure that I am getting the treatment in the right spot (although I'm not sure how they could miss it!). They use green and blue markers to write all over me. Maybe they can do some lypo suction while they are at it!

After the setup the technicians leave the room and zap me with the radiation machine from two different angles. I didn't feel anything when this was happening.

Of course, just after the treatment was done from the first angle, the machine broke down. So we had to move to another machine and do the setup all over again to finish the treatment from the second angle.

So I was there for about an hour instead of half an hour as would normally be expected. Hopefully things move smoother the next time.

At first I was going to refer to my radiation as selective nude sunbathing, because after several treatments I am going to have a wicked burn as if I was sunbathing topless. But they actually have the gown over me during the treatment....so I'll just call it Power Sunbathing from now on.

I am scheduled to have 30 treatments in total. 25 treatments to the whole breast and then 5 "boosts" to the surgery site only. So I will be finished power sunbathing on February 19th.

After power sunbathing I will start taking Tamoxifen, the anti-hormone pill. More details to follow when I have them.

Also, I have had 5 of 18 Herceptin treatments and am scheduled to be finished this treatment cycle on October 5th.

Not that I'm counting or anything.

On a more serious note, Kim and I were at yoga today when our teacher read a note that came from one of our classmates. As you know, those that attend yoga at Wellspring are caregivers, cancer patients, and cancer survivors. The note was from Nancy, who apparently had not been feeling well before Christmas with what she thought was pneumonia. Unfortunately, it is much more serious than that. Tests have shown that she has cancer in her lungs and around her heart and she is currently waiting to get into palliative care.

Of course, we were all stunned as Nancy has been doing well and attending yoga for quite some time. Our thoughts and prayers are with her.

A sobering day for sure.

Love CJ

Herceptin

Today I went in for my first Herpcetin only treatment. No more chemo, yeah!

It was decided, afterall, that I would try the Herceptin without the Benadryl and Hydracortisone to see what happens. Good news - no reaction. From now on when I go in every three weeks for the Herceptin I will be able to go without the premeds. Whoo hoo! What a relief.

My next appointment will be on January 26th. On this date I will also have my blood work done and have a meeting with the doctor to see how things are going.

A good day!

Next week I'll tackle radiation.

Have a good weekend, everyone.

Love CJ

Radiation

Today's appointment was with radiation therapy. The radiation technicians ran a simulation of my radiation that will start next week. Basically they had me lie under the radiation machine and checked that my tattoos were all still there and that they could line everything up correctly in the machine.

My radiation starts next Tuesday (January 9th) at 1:00 p.m. At that point, I will receive the next week's appointments. Every Friday I will meet with my radiation doctor (Dr. Perera) for a follow-up. I am still unsure of exactly how many sessions I will be having, but I will be able to confirm everything next week.

After my appointment I headed up to the paediatric wing of the hospital to visit my good buddy Keaton.

New Year's Eve came in with a bang this year, but not the one we were expecting. Sean and I arrived at Mike and Janine's to celebrate New Year's only to discover that Mike was about to take Keaton to the hospital with what he suspected was appendicitis. Sure enough, we received a call a few hours later, with Mike saying that Keaton was going to have an appendectomy at some point that night. Luckily Sean, Sydney and I were scheduled to stay overnight at the Grays so we babysat Sydney and Terran (who were already in bed) and Janine headed up to the hospital.

Long story short, Keaton is just fine. His appendix didn't burst, it was removed in time, and he is on the mend.

But I tell ya, seeing a little 4 year old (okay almost 5) hooked up to an IV, in a lot of pain, really tears your heart out. But he is a trooper and has been such a brave boy.

Kudos to Mike and Janine for holding it together so well.

We love you Keaton!

Love CJ